Seeking Authenticity

An original poem about authenticity.

I love myself she said.
All the eyes darted toward her.
I’m unscripted she said.
Her papers flew out in every direction.
Stumbling through the room, gravity felt heavy.

I need to get some air she said.
Whispers filled the quietness like waves crashing on the shore.
There’s nothing here for me she said.
With a last glance back at envious, interested eyes, she walked into the distance.
Many are left behind when you pursue your truth.

Becoming an Authentic Self

As I looked up the definition of authentic, I had a really hard time with the dictionary. First, there are several sources that have a little bit of a different flare. My favorite out of all them was : of undisputed origin; genuine. This is just the definition you get from searching on Google, but out of them all it felt as if it carried the most weight. There is something about “undisputed” that really resonated.

Think for a moment about who you are. What is your identity? Where do you come from? What do you stand for? These elements of you are, these should be characteristics of your person that are truly undisputed. Miriam Webster defines authentic as : true to one’s own personality, spirit, or character. That’s fine I suppose, sure be true to your own, but now consider being undisputedly genuine. Like no one and no thing could argue that’s truly who you are.

Today felt like a good day to reflect on what makes me feel undisputedly like myself. As I continue to work on who I AM, writing out my identify and what I believe I stand for today, I think I struggle a bit like most people with what is genuinely me. I actually think with so much that I’ve done over the last several years of my life, I lost a little bit of what made me authentic.

It’s not an easy realization. It’s actually quite sad. But, slowly, as I’ve repaired my own brokenness and focused on gratitude, blessing and self growth, I’ve come to find pieces of me that make me more authentic than ever. There’s just one last task that remains when you begin to find your authentic self – you must fight to keep it.

Fight for all you have to stay genuine and authentic. Whether it’s using your voice, questioning your behaviors, denying the temptations or the allure of what others are trying to get you to do and say. These are all the battles we must face each day to stay real to ourselves.

Today, I”m reflecting on my genuine self. I’m defining my identity in detail. One thing I know I am for sure is a writer. I love to write. I’m passionate about words and what they mean. So, the poem I wrote above is real, it’s authentic. And although one of my greatest fears is sharing the writing I do for some weird human psychological reasons I can’t begin to unfold, I know that my only way through the fear is by just letting it free.

Just like the girl in the poem, when you pursue what is real to you – it often means you leave a lot in your wake. Whether that’s people or things, usually it’s for the best. Shedding those layers makes us more of who we are, but we have to be willing to let it all go for the pursuit of who we truly are.

Please share your thoughts in the comments or find me on Instagram at IntentlyAmy.

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